There Ain’t No Good Guys

Dave Mason was spot on when he said, “There ain't no good guys, there ain't no bad guys” in the song We Just Disagree. The latest installment of Survivor: Heroes vs. Villains was a prime example of this. The episode treated us to not one, but two sets of Immunity Challenges and Tribal Councils. Sandwiched in between were heavy doses of morality and plenty of pontificating on how the “game’ is supposed to be played. In the end, two more castaways left the game to join the jury and it became abundantly clear that there ain’t no good guys.

Five minutes into the show we had Rupert telling Russell the Hall-of-Famer that he was a disgusting, terrible human being. No shit, Rupert. He then went on to say that his only hope was to show the Villains the Hall-of-Famer’s disgusting side and ask them if they want to be involved with that. Good luck.

At the first Tribal Council we had Colby reading Candice the riot act because she turned on the Heroes in the previous vote and helped to eliminate Amanda. Moment’s later after writing her name down, he whispered that he was proud of the way he has played the “game” and wondered if she could say the same thing.

Original Hero Candice, was then voted out, leaving only two “Good Guys” to vie for the title of Sole Survivor. Only Rupert in all his tie-dyed splendor and the hunky Colby Donaldson stand in the way of all those despicable, low-down, dirty rotten Villains and a cool million dollars. This heroic duo is left with the task of upholding the honor of the “game”.

Please. Give me a break.

Hey Rupert, weren’t you the guy who stole the other tribe’s shoes and personal items on your very first episode of Survivor: Pearl Islands nearly seven years ago? Hypocrite.

Hey Colby, if you are so keen on playing the “game” the honorable way, why did you leap at the opportunity to align yourself with that scumbag Hall-of-Famer moments before the second Tribal Council took place? Hypocrite.

Indeed, both Colby and Rupert did team up with the Hall-of-Famer and along with Jerri, voted out Danielle. This meant the jury now consisted of Coach, Courtney, J.T., Amanda, Candice and Danielle.

In order to save their ass, it appears Colby and Rupert have each turned their back on the honor of the “game” and joined the dark side. This move left Parvati, Danielle and Sandra confused and very pissed off at the Hall-of-Famer. Jerri is simply left confused.

All of this proves two things. First, Russell Hantz is the Hall-of-Famer because he is the greatest person ever to play Survivor. Not the greatest bad guy to ever play Survivor. He is the greatest person ever to play Survivor. He lies, cheats and deceives better than anyone else ever has.

Which brings me to my second point. The Hall-of-Famer will never win the $1,000,000. When it comes down to the final vote, the other competitors will always vote against him because he lied, cheated and deceived better than they did. That’s because in this “game” there ain’t no good guys.

Until next time…from the booth.