Wednesday, December 11, 2013

Survivor 27.13

Mary Beth’s 2Cents: After Ciera's somewhat bold move last week, I have to admit, I was kind of looking forward to seeing the aftermath on tonight's episode. Granted her bold move really didn't work since it sent Katie to Redemption Island, but it was a bold move and, at least, finally, someone was making a move. Ciera has turned out to be something of a surprise really.

Who'd a thunk she'd be good a strategy? Not me, that's for sure. I still don't like her or anyone left on this season for that matter but, hey, she's thinking ahead and that makes for good TV sometimes.

Monica, of course, can't stop herself from over talking everything. This fact is not lost on Tyson who get really irritated when she does this. Over at Redemption, Tina aka Skeletor is now pitted against the Machine, aka Laura M., and her daughter Katie. She briefly talks of throwing the challenge to give Katie a chance but during the challenge she stomps all over her.

The challenge is the one where they tie together sticks to make a longer stick to get sets of keys through a fence. Then they open three locks to win. Laura M. makes easy peasy of this challenge, whizzing past both Tina and Katie quickly. Katie can't tie a knot to save her soul so Tina flies past her, sobbing all the way. Apparently it hurts her to beat her daughter but she would have had to lie down and fallen asleep to give Katie a chance. Katie was just that bad!!

The rest of the episode might as well be called “Everyone Wants Monica!” Tyson and Gervase shuffle to confirm Monica's loyalty to their alliance. Ciera and Hayden hatch a plan to get her to come to the “good side.” In the meantime, Ciera wins a much-needed Immunity Challenge and they get to share…what else…FOOD! Later, Ciera tells Monica just how yucky Tyson and Gervase have really been when talking about her. Monica cries. Really.

At Tribal, Ciera and Hayden do their level best to get Monica to see the error of her ways with Tyson and Gervase. They reiterate that Ty-Ty and the Gerv have been talking smack about her from Day 1. Thing is, neither of them deny it! Monica seems almost convinced but she votes off Hayden anyway.

Now this is either really smart or really stupid. If she is in the final two against Tyson, the jury could see her as a hanger-on and realize Tyson was the mastermind and give him their votes. OR…the jury could just hate Tyson enough to give Monica the votes just because the hate him. Honestly though, she's not making the final 2 if she keeps playing this dumb ass way! Frankly, I hope Laura M. returns and she and Ciera take the whole thing. Now that would be a great ending to a pathetic season!

Vag’s Evaluation: Okay. Here’s the deal. A couple of weeks ago I had more or less decided that this would be my last season of doing the Survivor recaps. That was based primarily on how crappy this season was. Writing the recap had become a chore and I no longer looked forward to it. It wasn’t fun anymore and the season sucking was a major reason.

But then I began to think. Do I really want to stop after eleven seasons? I could see ten or twelve, but eleven? Who stops at eleven? Not even bowlers! I seriously considered giving it one more shot next season. That would be an even dozen. What the heck did I have to lose? Hmm… What to do?

Well, tonight’s magnificently crapalicious episode answered that question for me!


Sunday’s Finale and Reunion Show will be my swan song. Sayonara. Cie la vie.

So, as I listen to Christmas music blasting through my Koss® headphones I write my penultimate Survivor recap. Wow, this is sorta melancholy. Typically I fill an entire page with notes while watching an episode of Survivor. Tonight I scribbled out 10 lines worth. Barely.

What the heck was I supposed to write about?

The first 22 minutes of the show were dedicated to that bullshit Redemption Island. The “duel” between Tina, Laura and Katie was an old retread that I have seen at least a dozen times. Then Probst tries to make the idiotic Blood vs. water twist work by making the dopey castaways cry. And Tina did! Oh the humanity!

One last thing on the subject of Redemption Island. Someone has to inform the producers of the correct definition of “duel.” A duel is a contest or race between TWO parties. Not three. Dopes.

After nine more minutes we were treated to Ciera and Hayden woofing down pizza, hamburgers and fries following Ciera’s victory in the Immunity Challenge. Zzzzz…

The remaining portion of the hour was devoted to making us believe there was a snowball’s chance in hell that Monica would flip and vote out Tyson. BUT WE ALL KNEW THAT WASN’T GOING TO HAPPEN!


To be totally honest with you, I did draw one bit of enjoyment from tonight’s show. It was when the jury was introduced at Tribal Council. When the freshly scrubbed Katie strolled in, Hayden’s eyes bugged out of his head and his tongue fell out of his mouth while uttering, “She’s hot!”

That’s it for me. One last time after Sunday’s shows. Until next time…from the booth.

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