Wednesday, February 15, 2012

Survivor 24.1

The Emmy Award-winning reality series premiered tonight. Survivor: One World began with iconic Jeff Probst welcoming eighteen new castaways as they embark on the adventure of a lifetime. The Salani and Manono tribes are being abandoned on the same beach on a Polynesian Island. There is also contest news, make sure you enter. With that being said, here is your first Official Survivor: One World Recap Trilogy for Season 24!

Mary Beth’s 2Cents: First of all, I can honesty say I was so excited to have this season of Survivor start! I almost hurt myself getting to the TV when it started, that's just how big a geek I am! Now, having said that, there were a few things that stood out in this first episode that I would be remiss if I didn't mention.

The concept of “One World” - I love it. Two tribes, one camp and let the mayhem begin! But I wasn't thrilled to see the tribes split up by sexes again. They've done that dynamic before and truly having “one world” would mean that the sexes should be mixed together.

The whole initial setting up of the two areas of camp started to get to be a little ridiculous! And speaking of ridiculous, I'm still not sure what the fuss was about over Christine bartering to get fire. Anybody? Anyone? Bueller? However, that argument leads me to…

Women are just silly. Now, I am a woman and, I think, a damn, fine strong one too. But time and again, women on television shows where they have to either live or work together prove that they are just silly people. Making silly rash judgments, hurtling themselves with arms akimbo after many warnings from Probst to hold those arms in and arguing over the silliest things. This leads me to…

Men are pretty damn silly too. Matt, the lawyer dude is the King of Silly Men. Sitting on his rock of a throne telling it “like it is” in all his beef cakeyness. (I just made that word up!)

He couldn't get over the ladies not giving up a chicken after the men stole all their gear. Then the other beef cakies decide the best alliance has to be based on who's got the larger pec muscles in the bunch and they grunt congratulations to each other for making that good decision. They actually have someone on there that calls himself Troyzan! Really! Which brings me to…

Colton…sigh…Colton, Colton, Colton. “Hello, I'm gay and I don't fit in. Save me!” And the lady did (not sure of her name just yet) instantly giving him the idol she found without even thinking it might make sense to take a good look at how deciding who she gave it to could help her. Colton is going to help her? Don't think so. He's not long on this season. I can feel it. Which brings me too…

Probst! He is by far the best host in television. Probst is Survivor. I've heard rumors he's thinking of retiring from this gig. Say it ain't so, Jeff…say it ain't so. 

Okay, I'm going to talk about the elephant in the room. 

Right from the start Probst questions the old guy, the gay guy, one of the beefcakes and the quirky girl, but not one question or even glance at the LITTLE PERSON IN THE FRONT ROW??

I'm all for being politically correct, but how is it okay for Probst to ask an old guy how he thinks he'll do out there but says nothing to the man with the truncated limbs? Turns out “Shorty”, as I am going to affectionately call him, faired pretty well. 

He's got bigger muscles than some of the beef cakers but I was afeared for his life during the challenge because he almost launched himself into the ocean when he jumped into that bouncy net! 

Anyway, Survivor's back, baby! I'm going to take my time getting to know this cast and take their shenanigans as it comes! Gotta say, I'm loving it so far!

Jamie’s Prognosis: I haven’t read up on this season at all so I approached tonight’s season opener cold with no pre-picked favorites. I’m sure PV is going to give an awesome synopsis and rundown of this years rules and plot twists, so I’m just going to jump right in and tell you what was running through my mind as I watched.

The journey started with Jeff Probst riding in on the outside of the helicopter and I really hate it when he does that. It’s scary and also more than a little schmaltzy. But he does it every season, and he’s still alive so I guess it’s OK.

As we were introduced to the tribe of 18 Americans I couldn’t help but wonder… why not some Europeans? I see that as a potential future plot twist and want “rights” to the concept, but I digress.

As the castaways were given 60 seconds to strip the truck they rode in on of anything they could carry, Banker Michael was the first to begin stealing items from the girls while they had their backs turned. Imagine! A banker! Stealing!!

My initial favorite was Kourtney, who sported a menagerie of tattoo’s as well as a funky knit hat on the beach. The other chicks didn’t really like her because she was different but I did.

Clearly the most colorful cast member this week was Colton, who is very, very gay (not that there’s anything wrong with that). When he found out that the groups would be divided along male-female lines, he was devastated that he couldn’t go with the girls. I kind of loved that and he’s at the top of my list as a potential fave right now.

 The female tribe was named Salina. The alpha female emerged with a mighty roar in Survivorette Alicia. She was opinionated, bossy, angry, and her boobs were flopping around everywhere. She could go far.

Sabrina was the first castaway to find a hidden immunity idol, which she unfortunately couldn’t keep for herself. She got a lot of camera time and she seems like a strong and likeable contestant. She is also on my top contestant list thus far. I can’t remember any of the other girls names right now so that’s how I feel about them.

The male tribe was given the name Manono, which in Samoan means tribe of beefcake. I must say that there are some very attractive young men on this season; tall, muscular, chiseled… I felt like a couch cougar on the prowl watching them strut around. It felt like I had wandered into Abercrombie and Fitch at the mall.

Leading the beefcakes is Matt, an opinionated, bossy angry man whose shirt disappeared almost as soon as he got off the bus. He could go far. The guys also have a short person as well as both a Tarzan AND a Troyzan, which is just weird.

The guys seem to be a stronger group. They made fire easily without flint and seemed to be more cohesive. The girls were kind of a mess if you ask me. They didn’t organize their camp very well, they couldn’t agree on things and they tried to rub a couple of sticks together in a hopeless attempt to make their own fire.

However, they DID fashion a giant pair of tweezers that they used to steal an ember from the men’s fire as they slept. But then they let it die out before morning light, duh. And unfortunately my initial favorite Kourtney broke her wrist during the immunity challenge and thus was eliminated.

My early prediction is that lawyer Matt and special ed teacher Alicia will form an evil male-female alliance and will attempt total island domination.

The Booth’s Bits: Because I want to go over the contest details one more time, I will keep my recap short and sweet - no offense, Leif. First of all, the Men vs. Women format stinks. It just isn’t fair, especially with this group. What a bunch of boobs! (Pun intended)

Call me a misogynist, but these ladies from the Salani are already going for each other’s throats and are in big trouble. The only thing that could have made Tribal Council bitchier would be if Manono’s Colton was included in the fray.

Sabrina made one ginormous mistakes already. First she was the first competitor to use the gut-wrenching phrase, “Game on!” I can’t stand that; it’s so ‘90s.

Another objectionable member of the Salani tribe is Alicia. If you look up shrew in the dictionary, I’m pretty sure that her picture will be right next to the definition. The only thing bigger than her ego is her Chicago-style booty. The sad thing is, she’s a special ed teacher.

Please don’t think that I’m giving the guys from the Manono tribe a free pass to the finals. Basically, they are 4 himbos, 2 Tarzan wannabes, a Benihanas sous chef on leave, a Russell Hantz Mini Me and Colton. It’s just that Salani is acting like a pack of dysfunctional high school prom queen contestants. Those females need to get their act together quick or the males and Colton will make short work of them. Oops, sorry Leif.

Now, let’s get to the contest that I first wrote about in my “Survivor Time!” blog on February 6. It is my way to celebrate the 24th season of this great reality show and say thank you to the loyal readers at the same time.

Hopefully this is self-explanatory and understandable. If not, ask questions!

Contest Rules:

1.    Predict the Survivors who will make up the final three. Please use only full names as they appear in the list. No nicknames!

2.    As a tiebreaker, predict who will be voted off in the second episode. If no one picks the correct person for week two, whoever predicts the earliest one evicted after week one wins.

3.    If there is still a tie, the earliest entry of those tied wins.

To enter you must send me an email at All entries must be received no later than 7:00 pm CST on Wednesday, February 22, 2012. This gives everyone one full episode to form their opinions and time to do any research they might want to do.

The 18 Castaways

Alicia Rosa, 25, Chicago, IL, Special Ed Teacher

Bill Posley, 28, Venice, CA, Stand-up Comedian

Chelsea Meissner, 26, Charleston, SC, Medical Sales

Christina Cha, 29, West Hollywood, CA, Career Consultant

Colton Cumbie, 21, Monroeville, AL, College Student

Greg Smith, 64, Houston, TX, Plastic Surgeon

Jay Byars, 25, Gaffney, SC, Model

Jonas Otsuji, 37, Lehi, UT, Sushi Chef

Kat Edorsson, 22, Orlando, FL, Timeshare Rep

Kim Spradlin, 29, San Antonio, TX, Bridal Shop Owner

Kourtney Moon, 29, Austin, TX, Motorcycle Repair

Leif Manson, 27, San Diego, CA, Phlebotomist

Matt Quinlan, 33, San Francisco, CA, Attorney

Michael Jefferson, 30, Seattle, WA, Banker

Monica Culpepper, 41, Tampa, FL, Ex-NFL Player’s Wife

Nina Acosta, 51, Clovis CA, Retired LAPD Officer

Sabrina Thompson, 33, Brooklyn, NY, High School Teacher

Troy Robertson, 50, Miami, FL, Swimsuit Photographer

Want to know what you’re playing for? Sounded like Jeff Probst, didn’t I? 

The prizes are: an autographed copy of Some Kenosha Softball, an official Survivor buff and a Some Kenosha Softball cap.

First place will get their choice of the prizes with second place choosing next and third place will receive the remaining prize.

Hopefully this isn’t too complicated. Again, if you have any questions, please feel free to ask. Pass the word, the more the merrier. Make sure you get your choices in before next weeks show and vote on the new poll!

Until next time…from the booth.

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