Saturday, January 11, 2014

For Your Information…

It’s been a while since I have been in the mood to write a real blog. Sure, there were the Survivor recaps and the “best of” Koos holiday offerings, but real blogs were few and far between. I’m not making excuses, but the whole book thing had me very occupied, that being said, here is a fresh blog. For what it’s worth… Every once in a while I am reminded that facts I take for granted are oblivious to many others. Perhaps its because I take these factoids for granted, but most likely it’s because it’s useless minutiae. I’ll let you me the judge.

For your information…

There is no word that rhymes with the word orange.

The phrase is “I could not care less.” It’s not, “I could care less.” If I have to explain it, it doesn’t really matter.

Being ignorant and being stupid are two totally different things, although, I know people that are both.

The Major League Baseball Hall of Fame has the final say on which team a player enters the Hall “as.” The players have no say in the matter. Sorry Cub fans, Greg Maddux will be inducted as an Atlanta Brave.

And to further enlighten the Hall of Fame ignorant, the bust of a player going into the NFL Hall of Fame has no team distinction. Sorry.

The remaking of classic sport-themed movies sucks. If you don’t know what I am talking about, check out the remakes of Bad News Bears and The Longest Yard. What’s next – a remake of Rudy with Will Ferrell in the lead role?

“Reality” shows are all scripted. You name it - Survivor, Big Brother, Hell’s Kitchen, The Bachelor, Pawn Stars, Real Housewives of fill-in-the city, etc. are all scripted. Except for Flavor of Love. You can’t make that stuff up…

The newer uniforms in the NFL stink. They are horrible. Prime examples – Jacksonville, Tennessee, Tampa Bay, Arizona, Miami, Minnesota, Baltimore, Philadelphia, Denver, Cincinnati, New England, Seattle and Detroit. I’m no Tim Gunn, but putting 10 pounds of crap into a 5 pound sack is never a good thing.

Whenever you order a “free” pizza using coupons that you have accumulated, don’t get your hopes too high. You can be pretty sure that the pizzeria is going to skimp on the toppings.

My all-time favorite Match Game celebrity, Elaine Joyce, is married to famed American playwright and screenwriter Neil Simon. Man, I wish I had started writing a long time ago…

Speaking of games shows, contestants on today’s shows aren’t as bright as they were years ago. Maybe not on Jeopardy, but on most of the new shows on the Game Show Network, the participants come across as empty-headed and even somewhat vacuous.

And, finally, I possess the uncanny ability to recall the uniform numbers of most athletes that I have seen play. Here are three examples:

Let’s start with an easy one. The 1970-71 Milwaukee Bucks were the NBA champions. These are the numbers of the eight players that saw a majority of the playing time – 1, 4, 7, 10, 14, 19, 20 and 33. It’s up to you to identify the players.

You want more? Here are the numbers of the starting eight position players for the infamous 1969 Chicago Cubs. Beginning behind the plate – 9, 14, 18, 10, 11, 26, 29 and 28. The starting rotation – 31, 49, 30 and 39. The setup man and closer – 37 and 27. Again, it’s your job to fill in the names.

Still not impressed? These are the numbers of the players that made up Vince Lombardi’s legendary World Champion teams by position. First the offense: QB – 12, 13 and 15; RB – 5, 22, 23, 25, 30, 31, 33 and 44; WR and TE – 80, 81, 84. 85, 86 and 88; OL – 50, 57, 63, 64, 75, 76, and 78. Now the defense: DL – 74, 77, 79, 82 and 87; LB – 56, 60, 66, 71 and 89; DB – 21, 24, 26, 40, 43 and 47; K/P – 34. Go ahead, start matching the players and their uniform numbers.

Okay, now that I have totally bored you, I better wrap things up. But before I do, I must present one last piece of information. It is perfectly acceptable to apply ketchup on a hot dog. Trust me, it’s quite delicious.

Until next time…from the booth.

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